Forgiveness
July 27, 3072
Red Dawn Base
Blackout Calvary Bravo Lance Quarters
2100 Hours
So it would seem that I am indeed capable of forgiveness. Needless to say I did talk with dad about Deschain's proposed idiocy and just as needless to say dad did agree it was a very bad idea. Only a bit more colorful. After I'd calmed down I sent a request with the good captain to discuss the matter which I hadn't received a response to when my lance and I returned from training.
We come back to find Mueller waiting for us after seeing if he could break our security with what few tools he had on him. Obviously he did and it only took him two minutes. I need to have a chat with Alex for better security.
Apparently Mueller had the same idea about weapons that Deschain did, but with a much more reasonable idea. Still dealing with shady business individuals but as a straight forward business transaction. He was most displeased about Deschain's little plan. He also warned me about letting my anger at Deschain interfer with working with him. I should have pointed out to him I have a great deal more of a reason not to work with Major Martinette, but I am and will and can do the same with Deschain. I decided it was best not to antagonize Mueller so didn't point that out to him.
Just after Mueller left I received a request from Deschain to meet with him on the balcony on the floor of the lance's quarters outside of the atrium. There he gave the best apology he said he was capable of. In that moment I realized my anger and incipient hate just left. And I remembered the ache I felt when I heard Deschain sing at Amy's and the desire to help someone who seemed hurt since I still think that the emotion in his voice wasn't pure acting.
And that was the moment I realized I could truly forgive someone. Not forget, no. Forgetting would mean that such a situation may arise again and make things worse. But to accept that someone else made a mistake that caused you pain and being able to get over it.
I accepted his apology for what he meant it as and said something that perhaps was unwarranted, but felt he should hear after he made a comment to the effect that there wasn't much room in the killer that he is. So I told him that he shouldn't limit himself which I don't think sat too well with him. I probably shouldn't have said that, but I did and I still think he needed to hear that.
Though now I wonder about this newfound capacity to forgive. If my mother truly regretted how things came to pass, could I forgive her?
Red Dawn Base
Blackout Calvary Bravo Lance Quarters
2100 Hours
So it would seem that I am indeed capable of forgiveness. Needless to say I did talk with dad about Deschain's proposed idiocy and just as needless to say dad did agree it was a very bad idea. Only a bit more colorful. After I'd calmed down I sent a request with the good captain to discuss the matter which I hadn't received a response to when my lance and I returned from training.
We come back to find Mueller waiting for us after seeing if he could break our security with what few tools he had on him. Obviously he did and it only took him two minutes. I need to have a chat with Alex for better security.
Apparently Mueller had the same idea about weapons that Deschain did, but with a much more reasonable idea. Still dealing with shady business individuals but as a straight forward business transaction. He was most displeased about Deschain's little plan. He also warned me about letting my anger at Deschain interfer with working with him. I should have pointed out to him I have a great deal more of a reason not to work with Major Martinette, but I am and will and can do the same with Deschain. I decided it was best not to antagonize Mueller so didn't point that out to him.
Just after Mueller left I received a request from Deschain to meet with him on the balcony on the floor of the lance's quarters outside of the atrium. There he gave the best apology he said he was capable of. In that moment I realized my anger and incipient hate just left. And I remembered the ache I felt when I heard Deschain sing at Amy's and the desire to help someone who seemed hurt since I still think that the emotion in his voice wasn't pure acting.
And that was the moment I realized I could truly forgive someone. Not forget, no. Forgetting would mean that such a situation may arise again and make things worse. But to accept that someone else made a mistake that caused you pain and being able to get over it.
I accepted his apology for what he meant it as and said something that perhaps was unwarranted, but felt he should hear after he made a comment to the effect that there wasn't much room in the killer that he is. So I told him that he shouldn't limit himself which I don't think sat too well with him. I probably shouldn't have said that, but I did and I still think he needed to hear that.
Though now I wonder about this newfound capacity to forgive. If my mother truly regretted how things came to pass, could I forgive her?
posted by Reika at 8:51 PM
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